Ann: I want to be like her. No nonsense, no namby-pamby guilt, no need to cause destruction in her path. Just call a spade a shovel, take what is your due and get on with it. I think I’ve done pretty well, had a good career, supported the family etc., etc., and then, out of the blue here comes the rocket with a blast from the past which gets under my radar, and WHAM!!! I’m on the floor again thinking it must be my fault. That’s when Archangel Michael rides to the rescue in the writing below:
“The voice that undermines your confidence is the voice of the devil, and that is why I have come to redirect your thoughts.”
Michael: “Did you do your morning meditation and protection ritual*?
Ann: Uh, kinda been backsliding on that….
M: You must do it every day because you cannot determine in advance what adverse energy may arise and slip past your defenses as did the call about your penny-pinching employer.
A: Yes, I did rather take that to heart, did not know whether to take money because, as it turns out, my friends and not the employer are actually paying it. Told them to keep it, but they said I should take it. So when it turned out to be enough money to help a bit, I backed off and am accepting it. Makes me feel like a small minded schmoe with no honor or convictions.
M: Oh, you have convictions. Protection from your conviction of your own lack of worth is why I am here. This is something we will have to work on because, as you step out more and more into the spotlight, many people will berate and ridicule you. Can you stand strong in your faith? I can stand for you against untoward events, and even malevolent thoughts sent your way, but I cannot defend you from yourself. This is yours to create for yourself but perhaps I can help. The first step is excavation.
A: I never heard of your doing this kind of work, thought you mostly saved people form physical peril.
M: Yes, that is my primary role, but I like to untangle knots also and you have tied yourself into multilayers.
So, first of all, is this payment unreasonable? Are you stealing the bread from another’s table?
M: Did you produce the source of income that generated the funds from which you are receiving this payment?
M: Are you surprised that the employer refused to pay his share of your fee?
A: Yes. I thought it was a business-wide decision and that everyone including the employer would be bound by it, not just my friends. I feel weird and greedy taking it from them and not from him.
M: So it is correct that you get the fee, but the employer should have paid it also.
M: Isn’t that on him?
M: The voice that undermines your confidence is the voice of the devil, and that is why I have come to redirect your thoughts. When you send energy to these treacherous voices that tell you that you are a thief, that you are greedy, that you have come to lie on the ground beneath the belly of the serpent, you are burning down the temple of the Lord and allowing darkness to arise from its ashes. You need to be on guard against this slithering energy because you see it, not as other, but as part of your own being.
You need to look more closely at why you are so open to receiving these voices. Your friend, St Catherine, who also speaks with you can help you with this, for she too succumbed to the voice of darkness that make her degrade her person and her spirit all in the name of a god she did not recognize as false. You have more in common than you know. I think she wants you to call her Cathy because she is feeling like anything other than a saint. She did not feel herself worthy of food or sustenance and tried to show her love of God by self-starvation.
You do not feel yourself worthy of money. Yet knowing that you need it to live, you take legitimate steps to insure that its flow remains unimpeded, but then you allow its receipt to darken your soul. Be more like your little dog who just put her head in your lap saying, “I like food, it’s good.” You can like money because it’s like food, i.e., good in what it allows you to do. As long as each is received in balance and not abused, hoarded, or lifted up as Divine, claiming your share is as holy as putting a well-cooked meal in your belly, for each sustains human life which is sacred. So I am putting my shield between you and these poisonous thoughts. See you take care to maintain the boundary.”
Ann: Wow. It’s easy to get pulled under when you’ve been told, “It’s all your fault.” It’s not. It’s only your fault when it’s your fault. En avant, mes amis, we fight for truth and liberty.