I periodically go through waves of doubt, and Richard is always helpful though a bit weary of my incessant moaning. I put his response to the latest round here in the hope that it may be helpful to others with the same tendencies.
Ann: Richard, can you help me become more steady? I am so easily thrown off my game.
Richard: Well, Madame, it was ever thus. Not once but many, many times have you ridden this roller coaster and should be wise enough by now to know that what goes down must come up and vice versa. I shared your volatility, so easily affected by notices or unkind words. I was a pleaser par excellence and so are you, however much we may claim to chart our own course. But each time we come out of the darkness of doubt, we find our faith enriched.
Here you are worried that you brought Frederick Douglass* to your blog out of thin air because he has been brought to your notice by this article or that reference. Love, why do you think you noticed this article or that reference? You must allow yourself to trust the system. It was through his faith that Bobby Kennedy weathered the horrific trends and tragedies in his life. Simply go back to faith. Ask Jesus, ask God, ask your angels and protectors to come into your system with their armies of truth to settle down these nervous qualms.
Open your heart to the light. You know that this blog could not have been an accident. Who could have ever thought that this could have come out of your tiny little brain, no offense, love. You do not know the source of these posts or indeed this communication, but you know that you receive it, that you can transcribe it, and if by some unlikely miracle you are the source of so much light and encouragement, then simply take a bow.
What you are doing is the work of a light worker. Many of your readers are the same. We none of us know exactly what that work delivers, nor can we truly know its source. That is where Faith and Trust come in. Faith that we are led, that our lives have been guided because we have the evidence of our own experience to buttress that supposition. And Trust to continue to allow ourselves to be led, which means, for you, to let the words come into your head and onto your blog as the guided material it is. The source is unimportant, the message is all. The voices are many, the vessel is nothing.
Keep that in mind when you start to feel you might have perpetrated a hoax on your unsuspecting fellows. Might I point out, love, that these fellows would have abandoned you in droves had your words not had the ring of truth. It is not for you to judge their veracity or authenticity. It is for you to carry out the mission to which you have been assigned in this lifetime.
Let this interminable and fruitless questioning stop. Just do the next right thing as you have been led to do. By the way, Frederick sends his regards.
June 10, 2020
*See previous post.
It makes me sad you worry about this but I probably would feel the same way. How many people do I know who are like you? No one. You are special and I wish I knew more people like you. Please keep up your communication and writing, we need to hear these words.
Thanks, Karen, these comments keep me going and remind me that we are a village.
I agree with Richard. Your words (or whoever's words) always have the ring of truth for me also. Thanks for allowing them to flow out of you and for working with (and overcoming) your resistance which questions their authenticity.
Christine, thank you, it means so much to me to know that this blog has been of help to you, really appreciate your taking the time to comment. Kind regards, Ann
Ann, your blogs give me encouragement and much needed pause to think and feel. Whenever I feel the "I don't wanna's," be it housework, yard work, a job, etc., I say to myself, "Do the next right thing," and a surge of good energy moves me to get it done with a sense of accomplishment dashed in. Thank you.