I have always worried about this. So while I had Peter here, I thought I would ask.
Ann: Peter, do we have to be willing to be crucified?
Simon Peter: Ah yes, and this is why I came. You have been fidgeting over this question which seems to you the most basic, the most critical, for if we are not so willing, then our commitment is not honest, true and complete. And this is the bridge too far for you, is it not? And if you cannot go this far, who are you and what is your worth?
You are right to ask me because I could not take that step, reach that plateau where earthly concerns, where physical fear and spiritual insecurity are no longer of moment. Our Lord did reach that plateau. He landed there, and from that vantage point he could see around him in all directions. He was not limited by this world or that time. His was a 360 degrees multi-dimensional vision. From that perspective he could and he found himself terrified to realize that he might not be able to carry through.
So your fears are not yours alone, little one. I too drowned in such fear for the radical steps I was taking. But not every life is a life of great decision, a turn toward or away from the light in some seminal fashion. Some lives are teaching lives, lives in which we move into the lessons we need so that we can begin to approach that plateau.
Such is your life now. You are coming back into the realization of some of the vibrations from earlier times and places and will begin to knit together current experiences with the frequencies of those past lives where you pushed the ball further down the road but not all the way home.
You may not climb the plateau in this life, but you are not prohibited from doing so. This is your choice, your journey, your learning experience. It will happen when you are ready. You will never be forced onto that plateau. Indeed such a thing would not be possible. You can therefore rest easy that your welfare in body and spirit is of the highest concern to your Maker, and that nothing will be asked of you that you are not ready to give.
You will make a mountain out of a mole hill. Just go on and climb the mole hill, then the next and the next. Then the mountain will take care of itself.
May 8, 2020